if dreams were lightning & thunder was desire, this old house would have burnt down a long time ago.

Dear My Metabolism,
Please catch up. you're lagging. it'd be nice if you could maybe make up for lost time but putting in a little overtime this week. Thank you.
Love,
Katie's tummy and lovehandles.

Dear Lucy the Cat,
It's cute how you always have to be in my lap the second I sit down, but please do not attempt this when there is already a laptop there. It's frustrating. Forigive me? i still think you're pretty.
Love,
your crappy mom

Dear My Motivation,
See letter to Metabolism
Love,
All those blogs and recipes that have yet to be posted

Dear Skinny Girls,
Eat a cheeseburger.
You're making me look bad.
Hate,
Katie Katie Cupcake Lady

Dear Katie,
Please start using your imagination and creative abilities more. You are wasting a ridiculous amount of talent and potential due to your excessive laziness.
Love,
All Katie's unwritten prose.

Dear Fashion World,
Please make me a dress to wear for my friends wedding on Friday. Let it be perfectly me, and just my size, and cost one quarter. And let it arrive on my doorstep, because I do not have time to go hunt for it.
Love,
sophistiKatie

Dear Danny Gokey,
You are my American Idol.
I think you are handsome, but don't tell Husbear. He might get jealous.
Love <33,
Katie

Dear Springtime,
Please also reference the letter addressed to my metabolism.
Love,
Katie's severe Seasonal Affective Disorder and constant yearning for sunshine.

Dear Oreos,
GET AWAY FROM ME. DONT THINK I CANT HEAR YOU TAUNTING ME.
Hate,
the same things that wrote the letter to my metabolism.
(ps don't take it personally. you are irresistable for a reason.)

4 comments

  1. madden & dieringer. on March 26, 2009 at 7:11 AM

    Um. I loved this. Hahaha.

     
  2. john & kristin. on March 27, 2009 at 6:39 AM

    you are truly one of a kind, kit!

    btw, i'm with you on the skinny girls letter...

     
  3. postmoderngoddess on April 1, 2009 at 10:35 AM

    haha. I write letter to inanimate objects all the time. I think it works. :)

     
  4. Laura on April 2, 2009 at 11:42 AM

    This is fantastic!!!!
    And creative
    And funny
    And well written
    And took motivation to write

    so don't beat yourself up...keep doing what you are doing..and I will continue to read!